So Grateful To Be Nowhere

The above quote is from a song called "Hateful" by The Clash.  The song is about a man who is addicted to drugs but I can relate to a lot of the lyrics.  Not that I'm addicted to drugs or anything.  Many religious people would say that I'm nowhere right now.  Nowhere in the sense that I am not tied to any religion anymore.  So as regards my belief in a higher power, where am I right now?

I would say I'm agnostic right now.  I can't say for sure that there is a God, at least not in the sense that many people believe.  At the same time, I'm not so egotistical that I'm going to say that there isn't a God.  Maybe you say that's a cop out.  It's just a way of avoiding picking sides.  You can say that all you like but in the end it comes down to uncertainty.  I commend people who can have that kind of faith in something.  I respect everybody's right to decide for themselves what they believe.  Most religions preach a "join us or die" message.  Do you really think that a loving God would be that blunt?  I would hope you wouldn't think that about a God who is deemed loving.

Many people base their belief in God on a belief that the Bible is his inspired word.  I have read the Bible front to back a couple times.  Due to many inconsistencies and some illogical passages, I can't agree with that sentiment.  Does that mean I throw God out the window?  Nope.  I only throw human understandings of a higher being out the window.  How could we, as imperfect, incredibly fallible humans, hope to ever understand a higher being?  I believe that the Bible has a good message.  Well, at least I believe the New Testament does.  That's where we have the story of Jesus.  I can't say for sure whether or not Jesus existed but I can say that the teachings tied to the Jesus of the Bible are certainly good for us to draw on, to become better husbands, wives, kids, people.  That you cannot debate.  There are good lessons for us to learn from there.  It is certainly worth a good read.

Am I a bad person in God's eyes?  I try to live an honest life.  I do my best to help others in any way I can.  I try put others ahead of myself.  Despite this, many people would say I'm going to go to hell or that I wouldn't survive Judgement Day.  Does that sound fair?  Does that sound reasonable?  I certainly don't think so.  Do I really deserve the same fate as a child rapist or a murderer, simply because I don't believe in your idea of God?  That doesn't sound like justice to me.

There have been a lot of bad things done in the name of religion.  There has been a lot of good that has come from religion.  Do I believe religion is the bane of society?  Absolutely not.  There are quite a few reasonable religious people.  After all, we all want to be happy.  Religion has helped many people attain self-satisfaction and happiness.  Good for them!  I applaud them for finding that.  It's not easy to locate, especially with all the trouble we have to deal with now.  As for me, I see a lot of lies and manipulation in religion.  I don't think I could ever find satisfaction in any religion. 

So I'm nowhere with religion right now.  I don't think I will ever join another one.  I'm just going to live my life and try my best to be a good person.  If that makes me wicked in God's eyes, so be it.  Frankly, I wouldn't want to worship a God that finds that wicked anyway.